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“God, Don’t Waste My Time…”

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We profess Christ. We pray constantly for our husbands to come to Christ and for healing for our marriages. We pray and pray and pray and we don’t see things getting better. We may start to get bitter and angry with God that things are not going the way we think they should. If we are not extremely careful, we can take a very dangerous spiritual turn.

How easily we think:

  • I read my Bible every single day almost.
  • I pray constantly, and sometimes I pray for hours every day (I personally used to pray for up to 4 hours per day on my days off)
  • I tithe.
  • I am doing “everything God wants me to.”
  • I go to church 2-3 times a week
  • I pray for my husband to come to Christ or to live for Christ
  • I pray for healing in my marriage
  • I teach my children about God
  • I listen to Christian music
  • I sing in the choir at church
  • I teach a Sunday School class
  • I am a “good person” or a “good Christian”
  • I can quote dozens of Bible verses

SO…

God better deliver.

“I mean, I don’t want to do all of this hard work in vain. It will have been a total waste of my time to follow God if He does not heal my marriage, bring my husband to salvation…. or give me what I want. Why, then my whole faith in Christ would be completely useless.”

WOAH!!!!!!!!!!!  STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was on this path. This was me. I didn’t consciously realize what I was doing. But how this attitude terrifies me and brings me to grief, brokenness, sorrow and mourning now!

David Platt says with tears in his eyes and brokenness in his heart,

“We don’t come to Jesus to get STUFF… We come to Jesus to get GOD!!!!”

What did Satan accuse God of with Job? “God, You aren’t REALLY worthy of Job’s worship, devotion and love. The only reason he loves You is because of all the great things You have given to him and because of his good health. You bought him off! But the minute you take those gifts away, he will curse You to Your face!”

  • THANKFULLY – God knew Job much better than Satan did and Job continued to praise, worship and thank God – even as he suffered. This brought great praise and glory to God’s Name on earth and in heaven!

We can SO EASILY THINK WE SERVE CHRIST BUT ACTUALLY SERVE STUFF (idols) AND NOT EVEN REALIZE WHAT WE ARE DOING!!!

I did this!

That is exactly what I did. I had no clue. No clue for about 20+ years that I was actually putting many other things above Christ in my heart – every waking moment. I was a BIG TIME idolator. What sin is worse than idolatry? I was constantly breaking the first and Greatest Commandment to love the Lord my God with all my heart and all my mind and with all my strength and with all my soul! I was committed to doing anything to get what I wanted and to make it all work out the way I felt things needed to for me to be happy. If Jesus could give me what I wanted, then I was in. But if He didn’t deliver…. then, well, He was going to face my wrath.

It is critical that we check our true motives here or we will think that we are being super spiritual and we won’t see our egregious sin. The tricky thing here is – we often don’t realize what our true motives are. We must allow God to open our hearts and examine them and expose every lie, falsehood, sin and every trace of toxic ungodliness and we must allow Him to remove that gangrene from our souls before it destroys us. This is painful. SUPER painful. But so necessary!

These are not things we consciously or purposely think. We may have convinced ourselves that we love Jesus and we are devoted to Him. But why are we devoted to Him? What is it that we ultimately want? And what is the fruit of our lives? Is it of God?

I learned that many of the ways I disrespected my husband, I also disrespected God in those same ways.

HOW I DISRESPECTED GOD:

  • I questioned His goodness and assumed evil motives on His part – I assumed God could have evil motives towards me (YIKES!!!)
  • I questioned His Word
  • I thought I knew better than He did, really
  • I put myself above Him
  • I undermined His authority and the authority of His Word in my life and in other people’s lives
  • I made demands of Him instead of approaching Him with reverence, trembling and awe on my face in humility before Him
  • I disrespected my husband’s God-given authority over me
  • I complained and argued against God
  • I really wanted what I wanted for my own selfish reasons, I didn’t want God above all else 🙁
  • I had idols in my heart, things that were more important to me than Christ – to God, that was like I was committing adultery against Him
  • I lectured Him, told Him what to do, got exasperated when He didn’t immediately give me what I demanded to have.
  • I didn’t submit to Him.
  • I lived in rebellion against Him – evidenced by my total lack of the fruit of God’s Spirit and all the worry, fear, anxiety, bitterness and loneliness in my soul

I cannot approach God with disrespect, demands, pride, self-righteousness and a wicked heart full of sin and expect Him to hear and answer my prayers. THANK YOU, GOD, that You did NOT give me what I wanted when my motives were so sinful! What a blessing that You did not allow me to find contentment in idols!

IMPURE MOTIVES:

  • I did X, Y and Z, so now God HAS to do what I want Him to do.
  • I am going to dictate to God what He MUST do.
  • God must submit to me.
  • I am right. I know better than God. God needs to get with the program and do things my way.
  • If God doesn’t give me what I want, I won’t trust Him or follow Him anymore. I will not put my faith in Him anymore.
  • The real reason I serve God is to get what I want.  If I do what He wants, then He owes me and has to give me what I want.
  • What is most important is that my marriage be saved.
  • What is most important is that my husband love me the way I want to be loved and that I have the romance I desire.
  • I cannot be content unless my husband changes the way I want him to.
  • What matters most is that I am happy.
  • I am going to do what I want to do, even if You say it is sin. Sin does not grieve my heart at all, and I don’t care how much it grieves Your heart, Jesus, or then great price You paid for my sin with Your blood. I don’t think my sin is a big deal.
  • I cannot be content unless my circumstances change. I refuse to be content in Christ alone. He is not enough for me.
  • I cannot be content unless God bows to my dictates.
  • God HAS to do X or He is not worthy of my devotion, submission, adoration, worship, praise and love.
  • I can’t actually trust God. If I really trust Him, He will hurt me and take away these things I want most in my life. God’s motives towards me are actually evil. I don’t believe that He is actually GOOD and incapable of evil. I really trust myself, not God.
  • I am SO AFRAID that my husband might do X.  That is NOT ok! If he does that, then my life will be destroyed. I cannot trust God if that worst case scenario happened. God would not be able to sustain me. God would not be able to bring anything good from that. God CANNOT let my greatest fears happen, because I don’t trust Him to be able to use my greatest fears for my good if He were to allow me to go through that.
  • If God takes X away from me, I would not love Him, serve Him or trust Him ever again. My greatest goal is to have X. If I can’t have that, then it is not worth it for me to serve Christ.

The above kind of motives and thinking reveal:

  • idolatry of self, trust in self
  • idolatry of my husband, or his behavior, or getting my way, or my having control
  • pride – thinking I know better than God
  • that my heart is not completely submitted to Christ, that I demand He submit to me as if I were god
  • that Jesus is not my primary goal, getting what I want is
  • unbelief
  • lack of faith

PURE MOTIVES:

  • All I need to be content in this life is You, Jesus!
  • You are all I desire, Lord!
  • I trust You, even if my greatest fears were to happen. I know that You are sovereign. I know that anything You allow into my life You will use for my ultimate good and Your glory. I don’t want to suffer if I don’t have to. But if You determine that there is suffering that is in my best interest, then I trust You. I will trust You even if I have to face my deepest fears. As long as You are with me, I know I will have everything I need.
  • I stand in total awe and reverence and tremble before You, God! I am but dust!
  • I am a wretched sinner! I am desperate for  you! You are so very holy, high and lifted up!  You are powerful, sovereign, omnipotent, omnipresent, good, perfect, sinless, beautiful, righteous, mighty, wise and awesome. I am on my face before You in utter and total humility!
  • I want You, Jesus! Nothing else matters!
  • Here is my will. But I don’t seek my will. I desire Your will first. No matter what it is.
  • I hold nothing back from You. You gave me ALL of Yourself so that I could be made right with God by Your blood. Now, I give you ALL of myself.
  • I cling to You, Jesus! I hold fast to You. Everything else, I hold loosely. If You take something away or if You give me something, I will praise You. You are good. No matter what my circumstances are, I will praise You!
  • I will trust You alone! I know Your motives for me are all good. I know that You are incapable of anything but motives of love and goodness towards me. I know that Your definition of good is my ultimate spiritual good, to make me more like Christ.
  • I will ask, seek and knock for things that I know are YOUR will. I don’t want anything apart from Your will.
  • Purify my motives. Remove every trace of sin from my life. I want to please you!  I want to obey You! I want to bring you joy more than anything in this life! Empower me to be faithful to You. I cannot do it on my own. Make me have Your Spirit so that You can tell me, “Well done, My good and faithful servant” when I stand before You. That is all that matters to me!
  • You are my LORD! There is nothing You can ask me to do that I would refuse to do. All I can say to You is “YES, LORD!”
  • I know that it is Your will to heal my marriage and to bring my husband to Yourself. I pray for these things, not so that I can have what I want for my own selfish pleasure or so that I can put those things above You in my heart – but so that Your Name might be greatly glorified and Your will might be done in my life, in my marriage, in my husband’s life and in our family as it is in heaven.
  • I do not make demands of You, Lord. I approach You in total reverence, respect, awe, trembling and godly fear.
  • I am in amazement that through the precious blood of Christ, I have access to pray to You and to have a relationship with You. Help me to use this incredible privilege in a way that most honors and brings glory to Your Name!
  • Purify me of every trace of pride, self-righteousness, greed, selfishness, idolatry, unbelief, bitterness, etc… Make me holy as You are holy!
  • I want to know You more and more! I want to be near You. If only I can be close to You – I will be completely full of joy and content.
  • Change my desires. Let me only want what You want.
  • I long only for Your will and Your glory in my life – no matter what the personal cost is to myself.
  • I want Your best for my husband – not so that I will feel loved the way I want to – not so that I will find security in him instead of in You – but so that You might be greatly glorified and honored and exalted in His life.

Our God is WORTHY of all of my devotion, worship, praise, love, thanksgiving, obedience, sacrifice, submission, strength, health, time, energy and blessing!!!!!!!! He is ALWAYS worthy of all that I have and all that I am. He is worthy of much more than I could ever offer to Him! How I long to always respond in praise – no matter what my circumstances – just like Job. There is no time, effort, energy, love, talent, thanksgiving or obedience given to God that is ever wasted.

Jesus gave His all for me – ALL to Him I owe!

Keep Making Me – by Sidewalk Prophets

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JAMES 4

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? 2 You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. 3 When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

4 You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. 5 Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us? 6 But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:

“God opposes the proud
    but shows favor to the humble.”

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

SHARE:

This is PAINFUL, PAINFUL and sometimes SHOCKING stuff! It can be a bit overwhelming when you first see it from God’s perspective, But, in my experience, we all deal with these sins and issues. You are most welcome to share your struggles, concerns, questions, godly wisdom, insights and what God is teaching you. Let’s support one another as Christian wives and rally around one another as we seek Christ together and desire to please and honor Him! Lord, empower us to become holy and godly women who are pleasing in Your sight and filled with Your Spirit. Purify our every motive and make us the wives and women You desire us to be!

RELATED:

My Secret Idol

But I’m a Good Person!

How to Make Your Husband an Idol

How to Pray for Our Husbands So That God Will Hear

Praying in Humility

Praying with Respect

Praying from an Obedient Life

Consecrating Our Lives to Christ

31 thoughts on ““God, Don’t Waste My Time…”

  1. Thank you, April, for this post. It does a beautiful job of summing up so much that the Lord has been working in me over the last year. One of the tools the Lord used to open my eyes was ‘gods at war’ by Kyle Idleman. I realized that for MANY years (I have been with my husband for 32 years, married for 29) I have made having a ‘Christian marriage’ an idol. I read books by the dozens on being a godly wife thinking I could make it so and all I succeeding in doing is making myself miserable, disappointed, and discouraged. Then I began to understand much of what you wrote above. The bottom line is JESUS is ENOUGH…enough reason and power to live in joy, peace, contentment, service to Him, and love…I am LOVED and HE enables me to love! My marriage has not changed at all, if anything it has gotten worse, but that is ok because Jesus IS enough. Thanks again for your post and your ministry. May the Lord bless you richly for your service.

    1. Tina,

      This is SO important! YES! Having a “Christian marriage” is a VERY common idol among Christian women, in my view.

      I praise God for what He has shown you! If you want to share your story in a post that might encourage the other wives, please let me know! I believe that God might use your experiences to richly bless many other wives. 🙂

    2. This is my fourth, and much desired, marriage. We are in our late 40’s/early 50’s, and have had several dysfunctional relationships between the two of us. I had been single for 11 years, and used that time to heal and get in the Word and try to learn about what a Godly marriage looks like, and unlearn the dysfunction/sin. We’ve just marked our first year anniversary and it’s been the hardest year of my life! One of my husband’s biggest complaint has been that I have these HUGE expectations of him. Which I do! I spent so much time studying the Godly marriages around me at church and what scripture says marriage should look like, that I have made an idol of what a Godly husband should be doing, and comparing my husband to that high standard. I’ve recently been humbled by the fact that I am not my husband’s Holy Spirit! I should remove the log out of my own eye, before I cast judgement on my husband!
      I need to work on myself, on being the wife I should be, and honoring the vow I made to my husband. I MUST rely on Christ for my source of wisdom, strength, patience and love, and not trust in my understanding!
      As Prov 3:5-6 states,
      “5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
      And lean not on your own understanding;
      6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
      And He shall direct[a] your paths.

  2. This post made me reflect on what we all want and need: to be loved unconditionally. In God we find this need satisfied, more abundantly than we could ever hope for! I’m still discovering that, wondering in awe as I reflect on its depth and absolute constancy.

    Unconditional love in human relationships is so rare! Women wonder if their husbands will still love them when they lose their beauty/figures to old age, or even earlier due to chronic illness. Likewise, men wonder if their wives would love and respect them just as much if they couldn’t provide as well, lost their hair, or grew a gut. Don’t rich people wonder if their friends would stay if their money disappeared, and don’t many people discover that when they lose their mates, couple friends stop including them in their lives because it’s “too awkward”? Think about all the ways people lack true security in human love alone. Even one’s mother can stop loving–mine abandoned me when I left the religion she had raised me in because the church mandated shunning of all those who disagreed with its teachings. It’s been 17 years.

    If we love God with anything less than unconditional love, aren’t we failing him in the same way that others often fail to love us unconditionally? Think how he must hurt when we “love” him on the condition that our expectations are fulfilled! Our unconditional love and devotion is really the only gift we can give him. And if the love of other humans means so much to us, imagine how much our love can mean to God. This post made me realize two things, that I need to love God the same way I want to be loved–without strings attached. And I need to love my husband and others the same way–without strings attached.

    Thank you for another great post, April.

    1. Elizabeth,

      Isn’t it ironic that the very emotional/spiritual intimacy we so crave with our husbands is exactly what God desires with us!?! We know how devastated and grief-stricken we feel when our husbands don’t want to seem to spend quality time with us in intimacy on every level – and yet, we grieve God’s heart when we don’t allow Him access to our souls, our love, our passion, our worship, our praise, etc…

      Love with strings attached isn’t love. God absolutely deserves to be loved by us unconditionally. And – He can’t sin against us or wrong us. Look at ALL He has done for us already!!?!?

      Beautiful pearls of wisdom here, my friend!

  3. Ummm, do you have cameras in my house April? Lol! No really I had a MELT DOWN this morning here at home alone. I stomped around crying and throwin a tantrum while talking so very disrespectfully to God. I don’t do this often, I do try to see that my motives are right, but that’s a constant battle. I find myself feeling sorry for me. I want to be loved and wanted by my husband. After all it’s what You say is right in Your word Lord. So why don’t You just make it right. You have that power. I have been miserable for 8 months since he left and I had tried to do every little thing right in your eyes. So why do You continue to let me suffer.
    All the things you listed April, I was guilty of. I do love Jesus and do want to please Him. But I still find myself trying to put me first. And dont even realize that’s what I’m doing. I do want to put HIM first. I say I’m a Christian who loves God so why isn’t that just coming natural? It’s this wretched flesh! I hate it! I’m still trying to please me and I’m idolizing my husband. (who frankly does not deserve that over GOD). So I finished my lil fit and read some scripture and decided to see if anything was posted on here today. And this is what I found. I have NO doubt that this is not from you but God speaking directly to me. So I will pray and ask for forgiveness and pray He reminds me daily that HE is ALL I need! Please ladies pray with me. It has been such a struggle. But I want to trust God. I don’t want to become bitter. I don’t want to be fooled by Satans lies!

    1. Kristy,

      I can so relate to you!!!

      There has to be a LOT of dying to self, submitting to Christ, laying all of our desires in the altar, seeking His will above our own and filling of the Holy Spirit for godliness to come naturally. What comes naturally to us all is sin. Holiness is not part of our sinful nature, obviously. So, it takes very purposeful working towards repenting of all sin, asking God to examine our hearts and motives and every thought, taking each thought captive and realizing what we are thinking and what our real priorities and beliefs are so that we can clearly see ourselves as God sees us. Thankfully, in His power, He is able to empower us to crucify the old sinful nature and put on our new self in Christ. He is able to transform our minds and hearts and make us more and more like Him as we seek Him far above all else.

      I knew very clearly that this post today was meant directly for a large number of women. I didn’t know who, but I knew God did. To me, this is one of the most important posts on this site. If we don’t see the issues here, we are stuck and can’t move forward with Christ and we sure can’t move forward with our husbands and marriages either until we are right with God in all of these foundational ways.

      God is VERY aware of our motives. Thank God He allows the trials that He does. Our dissatisfaction and discontentment and misery serves to help us see that something is wrong and hopefully will prompt us to go to Him for His wisdom, truth, design and abundant life.

      Much love! I am so glad this post blessed you. That is a total God thing!

  4. Hi April,

    I guess this is something I was struggling with and had to hear this…. Last month I was down with my tooth pain and I was question if God was a tyrant? And you kind of told me, Im physically weak and need some rest and need to get back and then I will understand God.. And true to what you said, I got better..

    Again from the past three days, going through a bad phase.. My three year old daughter isn’t well.. Shes crying whole time with pain, she even cry’s when we lift her. Took her to another doctor, he gave her some medicines.. and he’s written on the examination sheet “reactive arthritis” I have no clue what that is.. But it was painful seeing my little one struggle the last two days… I was also physically weak and I dint question God this time… I was just calm.. And I tried to pray but I couldn’t.. But I was better than the last time.. I know he’s in control of every situation.. But suffering, its been more than year that as a family we have something or the other coming across.. Some very bad fights with my in laws, moving to a new house, bitter fights with my husband, illnesses and a lot more…. I can’t understand why all this… But one thing now is that I know God is in control and I can’t question his power and his ways.. But with all my worry’s and anxiety its difficult for me to say that Im living a life worthy of his calling!!

    Love
    Vinodhini

    1. Vinodhini,

      Oh no! I am so sorry to hear about your sweet daughter! Did this just start? Was she sick recently with a bacterial infection? How difficult to see her suffer so much. 🙁 where is her pain? Are the doctors able to give anything that is helping her pain level?

      I wish I could hug your neck!!!

      Sometimes when we are physically and emotionally and spiritually exhausted, it can be impossible for us to pray. Then, we can trust the Holy Spirit to intercede for us in groans that words cannot express. You are also welcome to ask for prayer here!

      Some suffering comes from our own sin. That is what I experienced earlier in my marriage. Sometimes suffering comes from the enemy. Sometimes suffering comes from someone else’s sin. Sometimes suffering comes because we live in a fallen world that is cursed. Sometimes suffering is discipline from God. But always, suffering is God’s servant, He is able to use it to mature us and refine and purify our faith and to make us more like Christ and bring glory to Himself.

      I pray for healing for your sweet girl, and for rest for all of you! In she able to sleep at all? I pray for God’s peace to flood your soul and for you to be able to learn anything God has for you to learn and for you to have wisdom how to best approach your husband and care for your daughter. I pray for strength, courage, joy and comfort from God in this time of testing.

      Much love to you, my precious sister!

      1. Hi April,

        Shes crying with pain, she sleeps well… We’ve taken blood tests… Last night my husband prayed and he was saying have faith she will be fine.. We got up in the morning, she was reluctant to get out of the bed but miraculously after having a hot water shower, she is doing fine.. Awaiting blood tests…

        This morning I read Romans 11: 33-36

        3 O the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgements and how inscrutable his ways!

        34 ‘For who has known the mind of the Lord?
        Or who has been his counsellor?’
        35 ‘Or who has given a gift to him,
        to receive a gift in return?’

        36 For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory for ever. Amen.

        As I read this I dint know if my daughter would get well, or the various storms in my life subside.. But I was sure we are all on this earth to give GOD the GLORY!!

        Thank you for praying dear April…. I’m unable to spend time in His presence as much as I want to, but my mind is so much at peace unlike before…

        Hugs
        Vinodhini

        1. Vinodhini,
          I am so glad she felt better after a hot shower. Sweet little girl!

          What a precious passage of scripture with SO MUCH PROMISE and assurance.

          Thank you for sharing this, I am thrilled about what God is doing in your heart!!!!

          Much love,
          April

          1. April,

            Thank you so much for showing me my broken relationship with Christ!! There is so much peace that passeth all understanding!!!

            The test reports are quite alarming.. Her serum C reactive protein is 73 while the normal range is < 2.8 and ESR is 82 which has to be 0-20.. I dont know whats the relevance, tomorrow morning we will take her to the doctor…

            Keep her in your prayers…
            Love you loads
            Vinodhini

          2. Vinodhini,
            We will be praying that your little girl gets better, and that you have the peace and strength from God’s spirit that you need. Much love to you, our sister. Elizabeth

          3. Elizabeth & Vinodhini ~
            I am a few days behind reading posts, but if you read this, please know that I also am praying for you both. Oh, sometimes I wish we could all be together in the flesh to hug & smile & cry these things out!! Sending much love to you, sisters!

  5. A very powerful post April, definitely one that makes a person sit up and take notice and take stock of how they are approaching God, no matter if they are a wife or husband.

    1. Elovesc33,

      I’m so glad this post blessed you. I sure needed this information 20 years ago or more myself. It was fascinating and terrifying for me as I learned what respect and disrespect mean to our husbands to realize that many of those same things are disrespectful or respectful to God. And I was shocked to realize how disrespectful I had been to God, without realizing it, just like I had disrespected Greg so much without realizing it.

      We NEED a healthy and godly fear of God. That message has been lost in recent decades, along with the concept of respecting our husbands.

      I am so thankful God opened my eyes to my sin. I was so blind and deceived.

      I pray this post might shine the blazing light and truth of God’s Word into the darkest corners of our souls, that we might repent and find reconciliation, restoration and healing with God!

  6. thank you so much for your honesty
    It is very powerful to see in black and white what some of my “secret sins” have been for a long long time.
    I’ve been feeling sorry for myself because I’ve been saved for 25 yrs and yet my life is full of angst and struggles. I am appalled at how frail my faith seems.
    it is a big help to have some of the most damaging attitudes like putting expectations on God delineated and called by their correct name: sin.

  7. I think you were “really” writing this article about me and my idolatry and pride and self-righteousness. The LORD has so humbled me and continues to do so. I pray He never stops. My husband has pornography addiction with no remorse or guilt. I am currently letting go of trying to be his Holy Spirit, instead of letting God, and I allowed my pride to believe that this was okay, because I know what God’s will is for my husband to love me like Christ loved the church. Hello! Not my place! Thank you, God, for convicting my heart! I also made my husband an idol; assuming all my needs were suppose to be met by him. God shared with me otherwise; actually, very clearly today in church! The brokenness I felt and still feel. I know that this situation in our marriage is just as much for my spiritual growth as my husband’s. Thank you for helping me grow with each article. Blessings!!

    1. Melissa,

      I am so in awe of how God is able to use even our sin and mistakes for His glory. I’m so glad you are listening! When we come before Him with a broken and contrite heart, that is the only way we can truly begin to hear Him and begin this journey and be ready to learn – being “poor in spirit.”

      When I see wives in this posture before Christ, I know good things are going to happen! 🙂

  8. I am most greatful for ALL that is written nothing added or removed these are the things am battling with currently thank God i have come to know please help me in prayer for Grace to make amend with GOD and my husband.

  9. Alot of your reasons are similar to mine. But i cant say im ok with havi g to put god first.

    Ive tried but he never comes through in the ways thst I need him to.

    Im not willing to face my fears or suffer in need because God wants it.

    No…. I cant. I dont trust him to br there or to fill the longings.

    Too much giving to god but not getting anything back.

    One sided relationship.

    1. lynn pabon the elite hero,

      I’m so sorry that you feel this way. Perhaps the story I have shared today may illuminate how NOT one-sided our relationship with God can be when we fully trust Him. Fully trusting Him means we lay down all of our desires and dreams and seek His will above our own. So we are not “using God” to get things we really want most. We begin to realize that He truly is the Greatest Treasure and that if we have Him, we have EVERYTHING good!

      Much love!

My grandmother is on hospice and won't be with us much longer (11-30-16). I will get to comments when I am able to but I need to be with family right now. Thanks for understanding.

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