From the archives – Here are the ways that two wives handle the “My Husband Forgot Our Anniversary” situation in respectful, God-honoring, husband-honoring, marriage building ways!
Since my hubby’s and my birthdays are only one day apart, he never forgets my birthday! Pretty sneaky, huh?
Seriously, in my first marriage I received tons of big gifts and acknowledgement on special celebration days… but not much love. These days, I am very happy and blessed to be married to a wonderful Christian guy who doesn’t always remember our anniversary, but so what? He brings me little gifts every so often “just because” and never lets me forget how much he loves me.
When we were first married, almost 14 years ago, God showed me that I needed to be the one to bring special days and events to his mind. So this begs the question: why does it always have to be the husband’s job to make celebration plans? I know that as women, we love the romantic notion that our hubbies will come through the door with a huge bouquet of roses and sweep us off our feet, but that reality is rooted in unrealistic TV shows and movies. It is not real life!
Please, ladies, love your husbands for WHO HE IS, not for what he can do for you or for whether he can remember your birthday or anniversary, etc. God placed you with each other because you are perfect together.
I’m sorry this is so long, but I’d like to share an analogy that our pastor gave my hubby and me during our premarital counseling: if you take an orange and rip it apart with your hands (NOT cut it with a knife), you’ll have a jagged edge on both halves. There is only one way that orange can go back together perfectly. So it is with the marriage relationship. You and your husband each have areas of strengths and weaknesses, and your strengths complement his weaknesses and vice versa. You both fit together just like that orange.
So, don’t pine away for what might not be the way you think it should. Don’t fight the dynamics of your God-given relationship. Use those strengths and weaknesses to uplift and love each other in the Lord!
I think I’ve said this before, Peacefulwife, but it bears repeating: thank you for such a wonderfully blessed and uplifting blog. My hubby and I are thankful that you and Peacefulhusband are not afraid to share yourselves and your marriage with those of us who need to hear it!
Just wanted to say I was so thankful for that post the other day “forgot our anniversary.”
I would have hoped I would have responded well even if I didn’t read that post…but sadly I probably would have failed to some degree.
Anyway..today is our anniversary and we already have a date next month that we will be getting away just the two of us to celebrate.
So I didnt want to make a big deal about today, but its still our anniversary so I got him a card and some yummy chocolates and put them
on his desk this morning before I left for work. I did kiss him good bye with a quick Happy Anniversary, I love you.
Later this morning, I got a text saying, “thank you for the card and gift, (I haven’t opened it yet)”…then he said, “I am sorry I didn’t get you anything. I have been so busy with work and the girls I dont have a spare second.” He said, “Give me a couple weeks when work is less crazy and I will make it up to you.” He then said, “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I am so thankful for you.” I said, ” Thank you, Baby! I know your heart, Baby, and I don’t need a card to tell me that. I did it for you because I love doing things like that.” Then he said, “I will have something for you, just not today.” I said, “I’m being honest, Honey, when I say, ‘I have all I need because I have you.'” And I do truly mean that.
In the past (or probably even before I read that post)…I would have gotten sad or disapointed and thought, “Well you had time to go the Jeep store this week because your mind is on that stuff, but not on me.” So in reality…yeah that thought did enter my mind, but I quickly dismissed it! My husband loves me to death and that is all that matters. Its about him and me and our marriage that God joined together 7 years ago. I refuse to let Satan have anything on this day! My husband never goes out to “man” stores or spends time with guy friends…so if he spent some time at the Jeep store this week, I am so happy for him. He needs that. Its the same thing as me going to the mall to buy a new outfit, right! LOL!!!
Anyway..I wanted to share this with you because I am thankful for what I have learned this past year in my marriage! I am thankful that God led me to your blog to help “change me” which has helped changed my marriage in an incredible way. I am so excited for what God has planned for this next year in our marriage. I know its going to the best one yet!