A Wife Shares What She Has Learned in Her First Year on This Journey

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In response to my post last week – thanks so much to this dear wife for allowing me to share!

Some things I have learned about my husband in the past year, since working on respect:

* Complaining stresses him out. Even if it is about something he can’t control (like the weather), he really just can’t take negatives! His work life is all the stress he can handle.

* When he comes home, he needs to be greeted and feel relaxed, because he comes home to de-stress. Lists or the kids’ schedules are stressful.

* I have learned to email him our kids’ sports schedules and not talk about the schedules. This way, our conversations don’t have to be centered on driving/schedules/etc.

* He likes being around me more when I am quiet and peaceful. (sense a theme here?)

* He now sees his friends less (because I am more of a friend to him now, not a needy, complaining wife) and takes me out more and spends more time with me.

* He calls me “Babe” now & is much more romantic with me…since he feels more relaxed and respected around me, I am much more appealing to him.

How does my husband reflect Christ to me?

* My husband wants me to trust him in everything.

* My husband wants me to be thankful for all the good in our lives, and not complain about the bad.

* My husband wants me to just be with him, not just asking for things.

* My husband hates worrying and fearfulness.

* My husband truly does love me and wants the best for me.

* My husband’s timeline is not my timeline. I need to trust his timeline.

What have I learned about myself?

* When I try to “do everything” to “help,” I’m actually trying to control everything…which makes my husband and children resentful.

* I can let go of control, and the sun still shines…and I’m a whole lot happier and less stressed.

* When I was seeking perfection, I was not happy, and neither was anyone else…even though I thought I was doing everything for the family’s “common good.”

* The more in love with Christ I fall, the more peaceful and joy-filled I am.

* Being gentle and quiet and waiting is not weakness or laziness. I am actually a better witness when I am “resting” in Christ…a breeze kisses, whereas a tornado disturbs and destroys. Lord, make me a gentle breeze.



What has God shown you about what speaks respect to your husband, about how your husband reflects Christ to you, and/or about yourself on this journey to become a godly wife?