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She Is Worth Far More Than Rubies

Rough, natural rubies
Rough, natural rubies

Rough rubies, sell for about $900-$7000 for a small bag of them.

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Proverbs 31:10-12, 28-30

A godly woman who has noble character is a rare thing, even among women who profess Christ. You don’t find many women with a gentle, peaceful spirit who totally trust in Christ and are fully submitted to Him. You don’t find many women who are so filled with God’s Spirit that He empowers them to do what is right and who do not give way to fear.

happy girl

Confidence in Christ is so beautiful in a woman! It causes her to light up the whole room.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. I Peter 3:3-6

What comes naturally to our sinful nature as women are things like:

  • being afraid
  • freaking out
  • being anxious
  • putting things like romance, beauty, marriage, children or being in control ourselves above Christ in our hearts
  • grabbing for control or power
  • trying to force what we want (selfishness)
  • trusting in our own human wisdom
  • allowing our emotions to rule over us
  • trusting our feelings instead of God’s Word
  • bitterness
  • resentment
  • gossip
  • score-keeping
  • pride
  • self-righteousness, thinking we are better than other people


It is only when we allow Christ to have full control of everything in our lives that He radically transforms us from sinful women to Spirit-filled women. It is only as we allow Him to do open heart surgery on us and we completely trust Him and allow Him to remove our old sinful nature and old sinful heart, crucifying it with Himself on the cross and burying it with Him in the tomb – that we can find freedom from our slavery to sin. He opens the door to our dungeon that has imprisoned us in depression, anxiety, worry, fear, isolation, despair, bitterness, resentment, jealousy and pain. He breaks the shackles from our hands and feet. Jesus invites us to walk with Him out into the glorious freedom and abundant spiritual blessings of the life He has in store for us! Then, because Jesus was resurrected to new life, and we are in Him, He gives us new life, new hearts and His power to live in obedience to His Word.


We can choose to stay in the dungeon. We can choose to remain prisoners to our sinful nature and the enemy. We can choose to stay miserable and to enjoy our bitterness and complaints. No one will stop us. It is our choice alone to make. Or, we can now choose to leave these old ways and that old life and old nature behind and receive the spiritual gifts, treasures and blessings Jesus has waiting for all who trust Him and submit to Him as Lord and Master. My feelings don’t have to be my master anymore. I can boss my feelings around when I belong to Christ. They may be helpful to me at times. They may give me some useful information. But they no longer have to be a tyrant to me. I can choose to obey Jesus and walk with Him no matter what my feelings tell me at a given moment. Jesus will reward me with eternal blessings for my obedience to Him as I walk in the power of His Spirit. I don’t have to seek momentary worldly happiness anymore.

I am responsible for this choice myself. I am responsible for my emotions and my spiritual condition. God gives ME this choice to make for my life. My husband cannot make it for me. He cannot make me be content or happy! Only I can find contentment for myself and the only real place to find true satisfaction and fulfillment is in Christ alone.

No other human can make me happy or be responsible for my contentment. I must find my own contentment and be responsible for my own soul. If I am unhappy, it is my job to run to Jesus and take my pain to Him. I CAN choose to receive His gifts of joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, goodness and self-control. I must be willing to die to myself and allow self to be crucified and buried with Christ. Then I can count myself dead to sin and alive to God in Christ. And I can learn to rest in Him and allow Him to produce good in me. It is all His work, none of the good Jesus wants to do in my life originates from me. It is all Him 100%. He died and has provided victory for me. I can choose to accept and receive His gift and learn to live in the power of His Spirit on a daily basis as He conforms my heart, mind and soul to be made to be like Himself.

The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. Romans 8:6


It is the most amazing thing to watch God change you, change your heart, change your mind, change your desires, change your priorities and to cause you to love what He loves and to hate what He hates. As we fling the door wide open to our lives and allow Him access to everything, He will take the things that are most precious to us – as we allow Him to – and break them. He must see that we are willing to give up ALL for Him and that He is our greatest desire and greatest passion. It is only when we willingly grant Him access to our greatest treasures in this life that He will then give us access to all of Himself. Then we gain access to all of Christ, His mind, His heart, His power, the riches of heaven, the spiritual treasures of God…

Then, we radiate the beauty, holiness, peace, joy divine love and power of God. And we live in contentment in Christ alone. We are unshaken by circumstances. Our faith is firmly planted like a tree beside a stream. We draw all of our strength and nourishment from God and His very Spirit lives in us, controlling our lives as we lovingly, joyfully submit to Him in all things.
This is the beauty God is talking about that He desires His women to have. It is not anything that comes from her that is so beautiful, it is Christ in her that brings all the beauty. This is what is precious in His sight and this kind of Holy Spirit-filled woman is worth far more than rubies to God – and to her husband. This is the kind of beauty I pray for us each to discover and develop in Christ.

This is a 4.14 carat African ruby for sale for $68,000 USD

23 thoughts on “She Is Worth Far More Than Rubies

  1. Wonderful post April…as always! Thank you.
    On my wedding day, I read from the Book of Proverbs chapter 31, the Virtuous Woman. But I knew nothing about becoming one, even though I was a believer, a carnal one though. It wasn’t until I yielded myself to God and got to know Him as a loving father instead of a scary God full of laws and commandments, that my life changed. Now I am willing to live for Him alone and I know that all His instructions are for my good. And yes they may be uncomfortable to my sinful flesh, I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthen me.

    My life, my marriage and indeed all my relationships have improved remarkably as I began to trust God as I should. Thank you April for using your blog to be a great blessing for me as a married woman. Thank you for the practical insight into how we can improve our homes, through the grace of the Holy Spirit.

  2. Kelly,
    Thank you so much for sharing! It is a painful process – learning to count ourselves dead to sin and the flesh and the world and learning to walk by the power of God’s Spirit.

    I am so glad you are listening to God and seeking to hear your husband’s heart – even when it is hard to hear. I’m glad you didn’t argue back. Sometimes, God does speak to us through our husbands. And sometimes it is painful. But I’m so thankful that God doesn’t leave us in our sin but refines, prunes, chisels and molds us to be more and more like Jesus. It has to be ALL Him!

    Much love to you!

  3. Kelly, could I send you an email? I wanted to ask you some questions about your journey–some things in mine sound similar. Thanks!

  4. Andra_sn5,
    I am so excited about what God is showing you! I think we all must wrestle with legalism and performance and thinking we must earn God’s love or make ourselves be godly in our own power.

    Sounds like a very good Bible study. Thank you for sharing what you are learning. What God is doing in you is beautiful! 🙂

  5. Wow !!!! I have not had access to the internet for several days so i was going through the posts ive missed and i am about to fall out my computer chair. This has been a major focus for myself and my two younger daughters lately. The question we have been asking God is what is true beauty? After running with a friend one day and discussing 1 peter 3, i felt led to try an experiment, i wasnt going to wear any makeup or jewelry for two weeks and focus on inward adornment. Not to be legalistic just as a personal choice to see how important my outward beauty was to me. I did good until it was time to leave home and face the outside world not all “dolled up”. Then Gods spirit gently began to deal with me and show me how i was getting some worth and value in the compliments i get or in how much i fit in with the fashion in trends of the world. I didnt even see this before. But he began to take my hand and walk me into freedom and fill that need to be accepted and approved of and found beautiful with Himself. He satisfies!!!!! He changed my desires, instead of wanting to look beautiful in the eyes of man and wanting people to look at me and admire something that i posess He replaced that desire with a longing for people to look at me and and see HIS beauty radiating through me. I read a devotional by leslie ludy on this topic that really blessed me in it she said, “Any human beauty, any human value that we might find within ourselves is just a filthy rag compared to the limitless beauty and glory of Jesus Christ. Christ’s beauty is perfect. And, in spite of what we deserve, He desires to adorn us with His spectacular glory. It is not our unique beauty that must shine for this world to see and it is not our own beauty that we must discover and embrace – it is His.”
    Spurgeon said: “If a soul has any beauty, it is because Christ has endowed that soul with His own, for in ourselves we are deformed and defiled! There is no beauty in any of us but what our Lord has worked in us.”

    These truths were so freeing to me, like every other aspect of the christian life Jesus does not call us to improve or try to change ourselves He says Come and DIE and let me live through you. are you impatient? let My patience shine through you. Are you proud? let my humility shine through you. Are you bitter? let my forgiveness shine through you. Are you insecure do you feel ugly? let my beauty shine through you. Jesus is the solution. He is our beauty inner and outer.
    As He did this work in my heart i began to talk to my daughters who are 9 and 6 about true beauty and i was surprised to see just how much this world has already tried to suck them in to an obssesion with outward beauty which is fleeting compared to eternity. My youngest was convinced she wasnt pretty because she lost a tooth. We read a chapter in a book about godly feminity for girls and this quote really stood out to me. “a desire to be beautiful is not unwomanly, but true beauty is not of the face but of the soul, there is a beauty so deep and lasting that it will shine out of the homeliest face and make it pretty.” Wow i wish i would have read things like this when i was a child and teenager. I feel if i would have grasped theses truths i would have done things a lot differently
    sorry this is so long I was just excited to see that you ladies were talking about the same things God has been speaking to me about in my life. He is so awesome!!!!!

    1. Jessica,

      WOW! Please, please, let me share this, too! 🙂 LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!

      I want to have these discussions with my little girl, too. 🙂 Please don’t apologize. These are precious treasures.

      1. Jessica,
        I LOVE the experiment you did AND I especially love how you talk about that anything we need, Jesus is God’s provision and supply for us – patience, kindness, love, joy… it is all found in His abundant supply.

      2. April you can always share anything i share that you feel led to share. 🙂 The conversations i had with the girls were very fruitful:)

    2. HI Jessica! 🙂

      I could totally relate with your “experiment.” Mine started as one after my conviction, but nearly ten months after, I am still on it. 🙂 It’s no longer an experiment, it’s my way of life. 🙂

      What helped me too, in my walk of faith and in keeping beauty and everything else in perspective, is head-covering. 🙂

      I first learned about it here in April’s site, when she shared about covering her head in prayer. The Lord convicted me of it, and so I asked my husband’s permission to cover my head with a veil to Mass (I am a Catholic Christian). I went a step or two further, and now cover my head almost all the time with bandannas/scarves, as I go about my daily routines; unless wearing a head covering is inappropriate like when I have hostings/emceeings/shows (I still do part-time broadcasting work). It allows me to always be in a reverent mode before God and its symbolic representation of my submission to my husband, reminds me of this journey that I am in. 🙂

      Thanks for sharing about teaching your daughters about true beauty. I am encouraged to do the same with Therese, our eldest daughter, who is also 9.

      God bless you, Jessica! 🙂



  6. Nikka,

    I smiled when I read your comment , I have now been doing my experiment for about a month. God also led me to wear only skirts and dresses. My husband constantly tells me I’m beautiful and to think I thought I NEEDED so much outward adornment to be beautiful. I bought into the lie but His truth has made me free!!!! Thank you for sharing this with me I feel I am not alone because I was beginning to question my convictions because I was comparing myself to others again but in a different way.Women whom I love and I know walk intimately with God but don’t share my convictions. I listened to too many comments from well meaning people who said I was extreme or legalistic. Which I know I’m not I just feel led to honor Christ this way by being obedient to the way He’s leading ME. I know I can’t earn my salvation or favor with God but because I am loved accepted and secure in Him I just want to give all of myself to Him out of sheer love and His grace.

    1. Jessica! 🙂

      My children and I were watching “Frozen” the Disney cartoon and I was able to introduce to my daughter, the concept of true beauty because of it… I just went ahead and asked her, “Baby, what do you think is beautiful?” Then, I went about telling her… “If you are kind, if you are gentle, if you are generous, if you are sweet…” you are beautiful in God’s Eyes and people’s eyes. But if you are angry, if you are envious, if you are not helpful, if you are “evil”… you are not beautiful in God’s Eyes, even if you may have a pretty face.”

      She then asked something that made me stop a bit:


      I said, “Even if a person’s face may not be so pretty, but if she has a kind heart, then she is beautiful.”

      It ended with me saying, “You are blessed, lovey, to have a beautiful face already… If you develop your kind spirit, you will be even more beautiful.” This is my daughter, by the way, who is just 9, but at 7 declared that “I want to be a saint.” which in “Catholic-speak” means, she wants to glorify God with her good life. <3

      I plan to continue with these kinds of talks with her and a separate talk with my sons on something related to this too, with a different slant, soon. Thanks for the inspiration! 🙂


  7. April, I am engaged and happened to stumble across your blog not too long ago. I just want to say THANK YOU so much for your advice! I can see how I already am disrespecting my future husband after reading your posts and have already noticed a change in our relationship since I have made some adjustments in my behaviors towards him all while submitting fully to God in the process 🙂 you have such a beautiful soul and God Bless you!

    1. Katie,
      YAY! I am so excited that you have the opportunity to learn this BEFORE marriage!!! What a huge answer to my prayers. Please keep in touch and let me know how you are doing. May God richly bless your walk with Christ and your upcoming marriage for His greatest glory. 🙂

  8. I am so blessed by all of you for the sharing, April, thanks for providing this blog for us to talk out issues. I also learnt the lie behind make up. taking care of my natural skin, as you allow God to work on my inside, produces a glow that that runs deep into the heart. I have learnt alot from all of you. Much love.


  9. “It is the most amazing thing to watch God change you, change your heart, change your mind, change your desires, change your priorities and to cause you to love what He loves and to hate what He hates. As we fling the door wide open to our lives and allow Him access to everything, He will take the things that are most precious to us – as we allow Him to – and break them. He must see that we are willing to give up ALL for Him and that He is our greatest desire and greatest passion. It is only when we willingly grant Him access to our greatest treasures in this life that He will then give us access to all of Himself. Then we gain access to all of Christ, His mind, His heart, His power, the riches of heaven, the spiritual treasures of God…”

    Such lovely music. 🙂

  10. Hi Peaceful wife,

    I don’t know if you can help me. I used to receive like 2 of your emails,per day, and now I don’t get any since June 15. i checked my “manage subscriptions” but i still don’t receive them. I really enjoyed reading God’s truth through your point of view. It is very helpful!


    1. Hi Elsa
      April has a blogvacation so she is not writing any posts. We have to wait and browse through old posts and comments.
      I found several I ha not read yet.

    2. Oh I am sorry I missed the date you wrote your updates stopped. Maybe it will help if you subscribe again and delete the older subscription.
      Anyway you cannot test that until April is back and writes new posts.

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