How a Wife’s Obedience to God Impacts Her Husband’s Soul (From the Archives)

This is a message I received from a reader.  She repented of her years of disrespect and trying to control her husband about 5 years ago.  She had learned some of these principles years  before, but a major tragedy in the family sent her reeling and now she is relearning and taking baby steps again.  What I really want wives to notice is not the time frame since her repentance to God – it is the changes that are happening in both the wife and the husband as she seeks to obey God.  So many wives think that if they obey God, they LOSE power and won’t get the love they want.  That is so far from the truth!  We GAIN the power of God working in our hearts and marriages.  And the riches of heaven.  It is all joy!


It’s so funny… we have had such a good weekend, and off and on all weekend he will just give me these little commands. They are random, and not rude or anything… just small things like for example, we were at a birthday party and he said, “why don’t you go over and visit for about 5 more minutes and I’ll come over and we’ll say good-bye and head home.” I just cheerfully say, “okay” and do it.

Or, (I’ve been counseling a very disturbed wife and have really sewn into her life and yet, she still shows no changes and really kind of tends to use me), and he said, “I’ve been thinking and I really don’t want you to have anything to do with that wife anymore. I know you want to help her but she doesn’t want help, that’s obvious. So, I really just want you to stop counseling her and just pray for her if you need to.” I just said, “Okay, if that is what you think is best, I trust you. I will put up those boundaries.”

No other words, just cheerful obedience.

There are other random examples that I have picked up on all weekend, but these give you an idea of the nature of them. Each time I respond the same. No questions, no different opinion offered, I just gladly do whatever he has asked.

I find it funny because it tickles me.

My husband is not usually one to take such a strong lead. I must admit that it feels kind of good actually.

Then tonight when we were out again (it’s been a strange weekend of kidlessness)… my husband acted like he was fixing to say something, then he paused and said, “nah, nevermind.”

I said jokingly, “What? you have to say  it now!” because he had this little grin on his face about what he was going to say.

So he said, “Well, what I was going to say is that I love this place you are in your life right now. (he got tears in his eyes and said) This is really all I need, Honey. I can’t even tell you how much I love this. We have been through hell, and I mean real hell… like fighting to breathe on so many days hell, and yet, here we are… like this. I don’t know how much I can tell you so you’ll believe it, but this really is all I need. When you are like this, it just motivates me to want to be the best I can be.”

Who is this man? I am just floored that he is saying these kind of things to me!  My God is working a MIRACLE in our marriage!! I am blown away!

I found myself tearing up too. All I could say was that I love this new place I am too, and that with God’s help, I plan to stay right here.”

That was the end of it, just that sweet, tender moment. Then we just went back to enjoying each other like we have been all weekend.

I know that what he is picking up on is exactly as you say… a peaceful spirit that does not give way to fear. I think it is ministering to him in such a way that he is experiencing a deep peace and confidence as well.

Like I said, simply mind-blowing! Only GOD!! I just keep saying that but it is oh so true!