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59 thoughts on “The Soft Serve Ice Cream Incident – by Nikka

  1. Nikka – I have said it before, this is one of my main “submission struggles”. To wait on my husband (and Lord) and not get ahead . . . . .when we do wait, it is so worth it and works out so beautifully. I praise Yahweh that he has opened our eyes so we can see how patience blesses us beyond what we could have imagined. It’s so fun to watch Him work πŸ™‚ Your business sounds like fun – I hope that turns into a really enjoyable time for your family πŸ™‚

    1. Hi fallenshort!!!! πŸ™‚

      Yes, you and I, and a whole lot of other peaceful wives have this as our main problem. Being dominant and go-getters, it is hard to NOT get ahead of our husbands and God! We simply are too efficient, to our detriment!

      Awhile ago during prayer time, some verses from John hit me and I cried….

      John 6:44-45

      44 β€œNo one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day. 45 It is written in the Prophets: β€˜They will all be taught by God.’[a] Everyone who has heard the Father and learned from him comes to me.

      I cried because Me?! He drew me to Him. That is why I found Jesus. And when I turned over my life to God, I became renewed. When I followed Christ, I became free. When I started reading the Bible daily, I got to know Who God really was and is, Who Christ really was and is, and Who the Spirit really was and is. In reading His Word, I also got to know myself, in relation to Him. And I was floored. I am so unworthy and yet He drew me to Him.

      Praise God that He had opened our eyes, fallenshort!!! πŸ™‚ We could not do it on our own, not even with our own will or desire… It was because the Father drew us to Him, that Jesus now reigns in our hearts and the Spirit continues to empower us in this journey.

      I think the business will be lots of fun. Godwilling, it is just the first of many T.A.R.I.s. TARI is the name of the soft serve ice cream business. πŸ™‚ It stands for Therese, Andre, Reuben and Isabelle — the names of our kids.

      Thanks again!!! God bless you always.



  2. Thank you for sharing this, Nikka. It’s amazing to see how God works in the practical as well as spiritual areas of our lives! Congratulations to Dong on his new business and to you on your decrease in busy-ness as you are still & patient, choosing to wait on the Lord and your husband. You and your family have so many blessings in store! I’m so happy to hear you reaping some already, particularly that Dong’s faith is awaken again and he is spiritually leading you! God is so good! Love & prayers for you, my sister!

    1. Thanks Cat!!! πŸ™‚

      I was thinking of your Dryer Incident, when I had my own seemingly mundane incident — my Soft Serve Ice Cream incident! πŸ™‚

      God works in all our lives and He is found not only in the Ascetic or in the Mysterious, but most often in our daily, seemingly trivial concerns. πŸ™‚ We are still living IN this world, after all, even though with Christ, we are already NOT of this world.

      It is amazing how He hassles Himself with Soft Serve Ice cream machines!!! He has a gazillion other concerns far more important than this, but that is how much He loves us. In His Sovereignty, as long as we trust Him fully, He makes all things work together for good, whether it is while drying clothes, serving ice cream, taking care of children, or whatever. πŸ™‚ Our God is really Omnipotent, Omnipresent, and Omniscient! πŸ™‚ We are so not! πŸ™‚

      I am happy too that Dong’s faith is being regenerated again. I have been fasting and praying for two weeks and will end only on Easter Sunday, that the Lord work in His heart too the way He did in mine. I am confident that since this is totally aligned to God’s Will for His Children, that He will answer it in His Time.

      May He draw all of our loved ones to Him!

      Thanks for the well wishes, Cat. πŸ™‚



  3. Nikka, what a great story. Thank you for sharing it and encouraging us. I love how you said you are stilling “Petering” him.

    1. Hi Jeanne!!! πŸ™‚

      Thanks! πŸ™‚

      I call it “Petering”. πŸ™‚ I think I will be doing this for a long time, although I feel led every now and then to share my faith with him. There was this evening when I just bawled my eyes out as I was sharing to him how God had convicted me and transformed me, and how I am never the same again.

      He is my strongest witness to my regeneration. He can attest to the gone depressive episodes, PMS crazy episodes, and worrisome behavior that I exhibited daily in the past… All of those are now gone because Christ freed me from my bondages in September 2013!!! Praise Him!

      I feel like the lame man asked by Jesus to walk, or the blind man who suddenly can see, or Lazarus who was woken up from death… What I am experiencing right now is nothing short of a miracle.

      I am still, however, trying my best to be silent about it, lest I talk too much and he get tired of my endless yakking. πŸ™‚ I also have noticed that the more I talked, the more chances of sounding righteous or too religious, and I do not want to turn him off or malign the Word by doing that. His heart is not yet that ready for that kind of sharing. So, I shut up and start “Petering” again. )



      1. Praise God for what He is doing in your heart, Jeanne!!!!!!! WOOOHOOO!!!!!

        I’m so glad you are listening to Him and seeking to abide in Him. What a blessing to have much more of God’s peace. πŸ™‚ He is our very great Reward!

      2. Hi Jeanne!

        I think our personalities were too strong and their love for us too deep, that when we insisted on bringing down their “blind faith”, instead of them, bringing us up to their level of faith in God, we “successfully” broke their faith down. πŸ™

        Maybe they care too much about what we think, or how to make us happy… I think they probably have secret idols too they are not aware of which is — pleasing their wives and making them happy at all costs.

        Let us just trust that God will regenerate our husbands too. Since single-handedly you and I broke down their “faith”, it must mean that theirs was the kind that was not too deep to begin with. Let us use this time to pray for them, that when the Lord restores their faith, it is the “real” one. The kind that even bossy, condescending wives (which we are not anymore, praise God!) cannot shatter.

        Let us trust that “all things work together for good to those who love God.” Even this won’t skip our Lord’s sight. He will make something bad into something good.

        I am looking forward to having my husband walk with me, in my journey with Christ!!!

        Don’t lose hope, my sister. The best is yet to come! πŸ™‚



  4. Kelly,

    God speaks so powerfully through David Platt!!! I learn so much every time I listen to him – I am beyond thankful for his ministry.

    The ones I would recommend are:

    – biblical manhood and womanhood
    – sex, marriage, family and the gospel
    – the cross and suffering
    – take heed lest you fall
    – don’t waste your life (this is what I have been listening to this week – VERY, VERY good!)
    – who is God?

    1. Happy Birthday April! Enjoy your special day! I’m so glad God blessed this world with you, you are a beautiful and inspiring woman! You have helped so many of us to really get right with God and to begin the journey of becoming the women He created us to be!

      Thank you April!

      1. Melanie,
        Thanks so much! It’s my prayer that God might use me to accomplish His kingdom’s work – however He wants to do it. I’m in! I am so humbled and thankful that He is willing and able to use me.

        Much love!

    2. Do you know if he has his own YouTube channel? I searched for his videos and found some posted by several other people, but I was hoping there was a channel to subscribe to when new videos are out…

      1. Hi
        Your story had Jesus written ALL OVER IT!!
        I know where I am right now and being fairly new here, I assume we all have started in the same place and reading your story of how YOU handled this situation showed amazing growth and I don’t even know you! The little “revelations” you put in your story shows you let God lead and HE showed you exactly why we should let HIM lead!!
        And you definitely gave HIM the glory!
        One other thing you brought up was how God really cares about EVERYTHING!!
        There were so many things about it that I loved reading. It is a wonderful story!!!
        Thank you for sharing and giving us all hope!!

        1. Amen!!!

          My husband and I, and the whole family prayed over the machine on its first day. We call the machine TARI (Therese, Andre, Reuben, Isabelle) and included “her” in our prayers as well. We prayed too for our ice cream server employee that she will do well. We basically lifted up the business and gave it to our Lord. We will just do our best and let God do the rest.

          God cares for all of us, in even the minutest, tiniest details…..IF we let Him. πŸ™‚

          There is much hope for you, PLM!!! and for all of us!!! With all eyes set towards Christ, we will all emerge victorious! πŸ™‚

          Excited to hear from you next time on your own “Dryer incident” or “Soft Serve Ice Cream Machine incident.” πŸ™‚



  5. Nikka, It’s so encouraging to see how well you handled this situation! You have come such a long way! It’s so beautiful to see how God has changed you and how you continue to walk in obedience to Him!

    1. Hi Melanie!!!

      Yes!!! I think I have indeed come a long way, thanks to the Spirit’s Help!

      Can I share here that some of my friends before my conversion are feeling sadness over “losing me”. I too sort of feel a “grief” over that, in that, it was “fun” while I was still my “old self”. “Free” to gossip, “free” to look down on our husbands, “free” to say that everybody was wrong and that we were right! But when I died to myself, that was when I experienced REAL FREEDOM. That was when I experienced Christ’s Peace. It is out of this world and “addicting”! I wouldn’t go back to my former self-righteous, judgmental self for a million dollars!

      How do you, sisters in Christ deal with friendships or relationships that seem to be part of your old worldly self? How do you still maintain those relationships without compromising your new recreated self? I do not want to cut ties, but I also no longer want to be part of the usual girl conversations that girlfriends usually have against people they envy and dislike or rants about their husbands? πŸ™

      I “grieve” for that sort of “lost” connection, but I also rejoice in the new life that the Lord has blessed me with!!! πŸ™‚

      I pray that I continue to walk in obedience to Him till the day He calls me Home. πŸ™‚

      God bless you, Melanie.



      1. Nikka,

        I personally took several large steps back from everyone in my life emotionally as I was learning in the beginning of this journey.

        Dealing with friendships and coworkers and relatives who want to husband-bash can get sticky. It is necessary at times to cut ties, I think. Or, you can share what God is teaching you – of course – they will probably look at you like you are an alien. But then they will tend to back away from you and not be so open if you do share those things – either that or they will hear and repent and ask you more or at least be curious.

        I have a post about how this journey can be lonely. and I have a post “Do Not Expect Outside Support”. I also have a post about giving godly marriage advice to girlfriends – which explains some of how you could attempt to approach friends.

        You can also talk with Dong about what he believes would be best for you to do with certain relationships.

        When you truly follow Christ like this and submit to Him – you begin to look VERY, VERY different from the world. You begin to have the aroma of Christ which draws many people to Christ through you. But Christ also repels and offends many, many people. So – there will be great opposition, as well.

        Praying for God’s wisdom for you in these relationships, my precious sister!

        1. Thanks for your advice, April!

          Already, they view me as an alien!!! They even said, “We are worried about you. Are you depressed????”

          To which I said, “I haven’t been depressed since I turned my life over to God. Peaceful. Joyful. Contented daily. Yes. But depressed? Not at all.”

          And then they go about saying they miss me and it seems that I “left” them and all…and I told them I constantly think about them even when not online or not with them personally. Truth be told, I pray for them daily. They are in need of God’s Grace because they have the saddest marital situations. πŸ™

          Dong said, that even Christ had to mingle with sinners to witness to them and to spread the Gospel, so I should not cut ties and still be friends with them, just do not engage in worldly conversations by either staying quiet or changing topics.

          So, I am going to have a picnic with my friends this May! πŸ™‚ I love them, but I just think that my change is repelling them and making me look like a Martian in their eyes. πŸ˜› May our fellowship allow me to witness to them about Christ, even without preaching or saying a word. Sometimes, all it takes is a really joyful smile or a really peaceful aura to make people see Jesus in us. πŸ™‚

          Thanks for the links! Will read them. πŸ™‚



          1. Nikka,

            Yes, they will think you are very strange – BUT – then they will begin to see the huge change and all the peace in you. Eventually, some of them will approach you for advice for their marriages. God may use you to bless and mentor some of them in time.

            I’m so impressed with Dong’s wise counsel.

            People who know me – even my twin sister – saw the change in my facial expression and tone of voice. It was inescapable. They will see Christ in you. That is the most beautiful thing. I can’t wait to see how He will use you to draw others to Christ. πŸ™‚

  6. Thank you for sharing this Nikka! I am learning so much from you ladies! I was thinking on last night how much stress I’ve let go of by not trying to take care of every little thing and get ahead of my husband. I can just rest for a change and not try to control EVERYTHING and EVERYBODY. I’ve asked the Lord to forgive me for it taking me so long to get this! Your story encourages me so much to continue on. Thanks.

    1. Hi InSearchofPeace!!! πŸ™‚

      I love your WordPress name. πŸ™‚

      I used to not have peace at all. πŸ™ I was worried, fearful, anxious, bitter, angry, depressed most of the time. πŸ™

      I was tired of living, tired of my negative attitudes, tired of fighting my sinful flesh.

      But when I gave my life to the Lord in September 2013, I experienced LIBERATION and FREEDOM!!!! I now live in Christ’s Peace every waking moment.

      I pray you experience it too. May the Father draw you to Him so you can find it in Jesus. And when you are ready, the Spirit will fill you with Peace. The likes of which, the world cannot give. It is out of this world. πŸ™‚

      God bless you, sister. This is a long journey we are in together. I urge you to carry on… The prize is eternal. πŸ™‚



      1. Nikka,

        I second that! I was definitely very worried, afraid, bitter, resentful, anxious and depressed before I began this journey, too – I think most wives are!

        I’m so thankful that God is willing to transform us when we completely yield to Him and trust Him. How I long for everyone to get to experience this peace and joy of His! And we all CAN!

        1. Amen!

          If somebody told me that this kind of peace is even “available”, I would not believe that person. To experience it, is to believe it! When the Lord said:

          “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (Jn 14:27)…

          He MEANT every single word!!! πŸ™‚ Of course He did, but to truly feel it, every single moment is mind-blowing! It is unbelievable! πŸ™‚

          And yet, it is there. πŸ™‚ That’s why when I am feeling a tiny bit restless or troubled, I immediately search my heart, as you taught us too, for hidden idols. And true enough, there it is! Then, I confess again to the Lord, and His Peace is again with me. πŸ™‚

          Sigh. May all of us experience Christ’s Peace and do everything in our power, and with the Spirit’s Power, to always remain in that Peace. It is out of this world!

  7. This was a very encouraging post πŸ™‚ I feel so burdened trying to control things or make sure my husband does everything right away at exactly the “right” time and it becomes an unbearable burden. It is so nice to hear not only that you are able to let go of that (sometimes it feels impossible like a compulsion), but also that God has it all in control so we don’t have to be.

    1. Gina,
      You are exactly right, control is compulsive and addictive. It is a tough addiction to cure, but with Jesus, thankfully all things are possible. The key is to replace your addiction to control with an addiction to Jesus. πŸ™‚

    2. Hi Gina!!! πŸ™‚

      I take it you belong to Control Freaks Anonymous. πŸ™‚ We all were part of that at one time or another. πŸ™‚

      It is awfully hard to feel the need to be “in control” all the time. It is only an illusion, a farce, a deception. We do not even know if we are going to be alive tomorrow, so that just goes to show how little we have control over our lives or anyone else’s.

      When we do let go and let God, He takes control. And when we allow Him full reign, we step back. We have a BIG God. He has our backs covered. πŸ™‚ We only have to trust in Him.

      I pray that you be able to let go and let God fully. It is the most liberating experience ever!!! πŸ™‚ I will never go back to my former worried to death self. It was a very dark time. Praise God He has freed me from myself and from the oppressions of the enemy! πŸ™‚



  8. Ladies,

    Due to some unexpected delays, the opening of the business is… TODAY!!! Thursday, prayer day for us peaceful wives.

    Do keep us in your prayers. It is 5 am Manila-time and the shop will open at around 8:30 am.

    I will reply to all of you later when I get back. Thank you for all your words of encouragement!!! πŸ™‚

    God is so good!!!


    May God grant you the desires of your heart, today and always, as long as it is aligned to His Will!



    1. Nikka,

      Thanks for the birthday wishes!

      I wonder how the first day went. I wish I could come buy some ice cream from Dong, Chocolate, please!!, πŸ™‚

      Praying for God’s wisdom and leadership for Ding and His power for you to support, honor and encourage him and bless him.

      Sending you a big hug, sweet sister!

      1. I haven’t heard about the sales yet. But last I heard, people are excited about having an ice cream machine in the grocery! Kids are stopping by, tugging their mothers’ skirts, to buy. πŸ™‚

        Chocolate, coming right up! πŸ˜‰

  9. Thanks Kelly!!! πŸ™‚

    I am still being taught by God to keep still. (“Keep still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10) In the beginning of my journey, somewhere in September, it was awkward, felt fake, and unnatural… but as I am practicing letting go and letting God daily, and keeping still — literally and mentally and emotionally and spiritually — it has become more “natural” and a whole lot easier.

    Whereas before I would feel very antsy or even “guilty” to “not be doing anything” (!), now I am enjoying it more. NO, it is not laziness. It takes a whole lot of energy actually to not move ahead of my husband and God! I think it actually burns calories! Haha. It takes so much from me to just STOP.

    Yes, God’s Answers are always the obvious YES.
    The painful NO.
    But most often, it is the trying our patience, WAIT. πŸ™‚



  10. Ladies,

    Due to some unexpected delays, the opening of the business is… TODAY!!! Thursday, prayer day for us peaceful wives.

    Do keep us in your prayers. It is 5 am Manila-time and the shop will open at around 8:30 am.

    I will reply to all of you later when I get back. Thank you for all your words of encouragement!!! πŸ™‚

    God is so good!!!


    May God grant you the desires of your heart, today and always, as long as it is aligned to His Will!



    1. Look at how you two are making it through! God is blessing you more than ever, because of your true obedience to Him!!

  11. Vin!!!!

    Sister, you have come a long way!! I was touched by your honest admission about being an “angel” before so others would praise you. I believe all of us were guilty of this too before the Lord convicted all of us of our sins of yucky pride and self-righteousness. I felt that God had not much to forgive me for, because I was actually very “good”! Imagine my humiliation when He showed me my true self! My heart was full of filthy sins! πŸ™

    I love how your husband complimented you. πŸ™‚ It must have made you feel good, only to immediately keep your motives in check, lest you sin the sin of pride again. Good for you, Vin! πŸ™‚

    I am sorry for the family rift that he seems to be in the middle of right now. I hope things will eventually pan out and become peaceful. It must be hard for you to be caught between a rock and a hard place. May your husband find comfort in your being his great supporter. πŸ™‚



    1. Will include them in my prayers, Vin. Seems to me, your mother in law is similar to my own grandmother from my mom’s side. Very hardworking, very driven, but with lots of anger pent up inside and bitterness. Yes, we all need our Lord Jesus Christ.

      Praying for your health as well.



  12. Hi Amy!!! πŸ™‚

    Thank you!

    God is really amazing!!! I mean, a soft serve ice cream machine?? And He hassles Himself with that? πŸ™‚

    As long as we really put our full trust in Him, He makes sure He gives the best for His children. πŸ™‚

    Let us just all keep still and wait on the Lord. πŸ™‚



  13. Thank you for sharing that! Oh, how many times I have push my husband into doing something instead of waiting on God to show him what to do. It just hurts my hearts to think about it.

    1. DaisyMae,
      I have done the same thing! SO SO SO many times. πŸ™

      Right now, we are working through deciding how to publish my book. I have been tempted to run ahead of Greg and God a few times in this process. That is what I used to do. But I am waiting. I heard an offer from a publishing company that is having a sale for self-publishing this month. I shared the offer with Greg. He said nothing for a few days. Now, when that happens. I just wait. And wait. Today, he did some research and found a lot of very unhappy customer reviews from that company and ZERO good reviews. Hmmm… I am so thankful that Greg is thorough and careful and doesn’t rush into decisions but evaluates things in great detail. He is going to spare me such heartache if I will just be patient and wait. And – God is completely able to lead me through Greg. They don’t go as fast as I like to go. But I have learned that faster does not equal “better” in the long run.

      I’m so thankful for my husband and his careful, thorough, thoughtful, responsible, intelligent, logical, reasonable, calm engineering approach. πŸ™‚

      Much love!

  14. Glad it blessed you, Daisymae. πŸ™‚


    May I ask for prayers for my husband right now, as well as his whole family.

    Dong’s dad died this afternoon, after being in and out of the hospital for the past two months over pneumonia, heart disease and diabetes. He was 78.

    Before he died, I was able to share with my mother in law the RICH Message of respecting our husbands. She is a saintly woman and a very Godfearing elder, and she took my sharing humbly and even said, thank you to me because it convicted her.

    The whole time my father in law was sick, she served him lovingly. He considered him “his sick leader” whom she is nursing back to health.

    The Lord did not allow for his health to be restored and instead took him already, to free him from all the pain. (He vomited blood 4x this morning, before he succumbed.)

    However, before he died, all his six sons including my husband were able to serve him and give them their time and treasure. He on the other hand was able to tell his six adult sons that he loved them, asked for forgiveness from my mother in law for not being a selfless leader and even for failing to be a “leader” and “provider.” They forgave and asked for forgiveness from each other.

    Today, we celebrate his life. He is going back to the Creator.

    Thank you for being with me in this journey.

    P.S. Note that in the third interview with my husband, Dong said his faith will only be renewed if something sooo bad or something soooo good will happen to him. The so bad is this, and the so good is the soft serve ice cream machine.

    Already, his faith in God is being renewed by all these. Pray with me that the Lord further strengthen our faith together as a couple, and the Lord find this “broken” time to go into my husband’s heart, so his faith that once was shattered will be not only restored but be deeper and more solid, one that will no longer be ‘destroyed’ by anybody, including me.

    God bless you all.



    1. Nikka,

      Oh no! I am SO SO SO sorry to hear about Dong’s father. πŸ™ Please extend my condolences to him, as well.

      What a blessing that you were able to share with your MIL before he died and tat she had a chance to try to correct things those last few months.

      It breaks my heart to hear him asking for the forgiveness of his wife and sons on his death bed. I’m so glad your father-in-law was able to do that – but how I long for our husbands to be able to learn these things now and for us to support them so that we have no regrets on our deathbeds.

      I pray with you for God to continue to strengthen your faith individually and as a couple.

      Sending you the biggest hug, my precious sister!

    2. Nikka,
      I am so sorry to hear of this great loss to your husband and your family. Thank you for sharing with us so we can lift you up in prayer. May God be with all of you so you may find comfort in His presence and with one another. Praising Him for the good He is already bringing out of this “sooo bad”–for the new life He is restoring in Dong and in your marriage and family!
      Love & prayers,

    3. Nikka, I just saw your comment and just want to add that I’m praying for you and your family too. I’m glad forgiveness was able to be spoken and accepted before your father-in-law passed away! I pray that your husband’s heart will remain soft and pliable so that the Lord will use this time of loss to draw him ever closer to Jesus, and that you and Dong will find a great source of comfort in each other as well as in the Lord!

      Heather (HisHelper)

  15. I am so sorry for your loss, Nikka, and for your husband’s loss. My dad just returned from Manilla, I wish I would have opened this sooner as perhaps he could have given you some help and support πŸ™
    God Bless you and your family!

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